"Un-vogue" to be sad: Depression and the church

This past Sunday, my university hosted a forum discussing the intersections of spirituality and depression. The keynote speaker for the forum was Reverend Dr. Monica A. Coleman. She is an associate professor of theology at Claremont School of Theology in Southern California and she speaks openly about her experiences with bipolar disorder in her blog and lectures.

In her discussion, she reflects on how she’s often felt that it’s  “un-vogue” to be sad in the Christian tradition and that “ we are too blessed to be stressed.” Over time, she has come to realize that God doesn’t need us to be happy all of the time. God gets it because God created us.

To hear that we are theologically created in God’s image with all of our flaws and shortcomings was a relief for me. Dr. Coleman’s words were more than academic for many of us at the forum. It resonated with me as someone who lives with depression and anxiety. In the times that are harder than most, a reflection that said that God is totally cool with how we are, as weird as we are, was needed.

In addition to finding solace in God’s affirmation of us, one of the points that Dr. Coleman brought up was the impact of community. For her, being in community is sustainable and something that brings her out of a depressive state. So how can religion be responsive to those experiencing mental illness?

Community. Remember when I talked about koinonia? As human beings, we have been created in community with other living things. As Rev. Amanda Lunemann, associate pastor at Hamline Church, told me over coffee, “we are not created to be in isolation.” It is not conducive to our already ailing brain chemistries to be isolated. Beyond the rising virtual connections in technology, there is a deep hunger for physical, face-to-face human interaction in spaces that are non-judgmental, often flexible with our schedules, and honest.

As church communities, how do we create those communities? Rev. Ruth MacKenzie of First Universalist Church in Minneapolis argues in her sermon that there are qualities of culture that we need to pay attention to: warmth, respect, beauty, expression, uninterrupted time, honest assessment, kindness, and connection. Demonstrating these qualities will not instantly cure someone of illness. However, it can provide a space where we can heal without judgments.

For Dr. Coleman, a part of creating a culture of welcome involves churches doing a better job of talking about mental health by first recognizing that mental illness is not a lesser form of ailment than physical illness. Churches can demonstrate this by ministering to the wholeness of each person in sermons, mentioning trigger warnings if dealing with more intense topics, and providing safe spaces that allow for tough questions in and outside of church.

An example of the qualities mentioned earlier is seen in churches that talk about mental illness with compassion and sensitivity. We need to talk about mental illness, affirm the human soul, and validate our friends’ and family members’ struggles as just as real as any other. In churches, we can do that in the pulpit, we can do it at coffee hour, and we can do talk about it one-on-one. No matter how it happens, we need to bring to light all levels of suffering.

To say that churches offer no room to talk about mental illness is false and over-generalized. A more accurate claim is that churches need to become better at providing spaces that are mindful of all human experiences, visible and invisible. We can be in dialogue with one another. There’s already a stigma with mental illness and frankly, we need to move beyond our fear of it. In order to rid ourselves of that fear, we must recognize mental health as something just as important as physical health. 

In our connections with one another, we must minister to the wholeness of each other, allow for personal expression, and provide uninterrupted time, warmth, respect, and kindness.